How to quit your job and stay friends

No matter how bad things have been, when you quit a job, it’s important to part on good terms. In my experience Australians and New Zealanders seem to be bad at making a clean break—we’re often too blunt and our work culture can be unhelpful.

On the other hand, it’s not easy to keep perspective when you’re handed a plastic sack and given 30 minutes to empty your desk. Fortunately this response to a resignation is becoming rare.

It’s also difficult if you quit your job because of workplace problems—maybe the colleague from hell or a tyrannical boss. Even so, you must resist the temptation to even the score.

There are three justifications for making a clean break:

• First, things change. That difficult boss will eventually move on, the company might rethink it remuneration policy or a spanking new expresso machine might replace the grungy instant coffee. Either way, it doesn’t do to burn your boats. You might want to work at this place again—one day.

• Second, even if you are prepared to burn your boats with an employer, there’s your reputation. Reports of bad behaviour during your notice period will spread through your industry sector. Employers talk to each other more than you think. So do colleagues. Bad behaviour at this stage can undo all the hard work you put into establishing your professional reputation.

• Finally, it’s no way to start the next stage of your life. I’m not talking about bad karma, it’s more practical. As you wrap up one stage of your life, you should be making a positive preparation for the next. Allowing your bitterness or anger to boil over means you’ll lose focus.

Here are six things you should do before starting a new job.

1. Tell your existing employer you are leaving. Do this as quickly and as professionally as possible. Don’t make a big production number. Personally I prefer to do this verbally, face-to-face, if that bothers you, write a short letter – not an email.

2. Tell your existing employer why you are going. Focus on the positives – even if there are negatives. For example, say your new workplace has wonderful coffee rather than whinge about the powdered Nescafe.

3. Wrap up loose ends. If you can finish projects do so. Try to ease the transition for the up and coming youngster who is going to fill your shoes—you never know, in this industry that person could be your next but one boss.

4. Work out your notice honestly. Don’t start late and leave early or skive off to the pub. Work normal hours—of course no-one will expect you to work around the clock now you are on your way.

5. Remember to thank people for the good times – there must be some. Be positive but sincere. Your parting words will be remembered longer than all the thousands of words spoken during your sojourn.

6. Close on a high note. Singers leave the best songs for their encore – try to do the same.